The Official Writing Challenge
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Wow this is a powerful story full of suspense. The topic this one is a hard one to interpret, but I believe your story showed the evil nature and hunger for money and power that your MC had. It certainly didn't turn out well for her at all did it?
I loved your take on Ananias and his wife Sapphira story. Oh how greed can destroy the inner man. Thank you and God bless.
09/18/10
You know, this is the first time I've ever read a fictionalized account of Annanias and Sapphira. I never thought about the possibility that the whole debacle might have had more to do with a scheming, manipulative wife - could be! I guess we'll find out someday! I did enjoy this.

Couple suggestions: More white space between your paragraphs (particularly in conversations) will make it easier for the reader. Also, remember to capitalize the important words in your title.

Keep writing - you have a real gift of creativity!
Great story! I dabble in this kind of Biblical story writing myself and really liked your take on this subject. Good job!
Great story! I dabble in this kind of Biblical story writing myself and really liked your take on this subject. Good job!
09/20/10
I always wondered exactly what happened. You captured the essence of this story well.
09/23/10
Way to go, Daniel! Movin' on up! ;)
09/23/10
Brilliant!! Well done Dan.

Whether it was Ananias or Sapphira who was the prime mover, I can well believe there was fully this level of scheming, conniving, greed and deceit going on. If it had been a last minute "We can't bear to part with all this cash" I don't think God would have been so harsh.
I think that's what you've done so well here, shown that God's judgement was not a bad-tempered knee jerk, but a measured and justified punishment of a serious sin.

Hearty congratulations. I look forward to looking out for your stories in ADVANCED!!
09/23/10
Brilliant twist on the Bible story, Daniel! After reading your story, I had to get a Bible to refresh my memory. Excellent job, and congratulations on 1st place!
10/10/10
Interesting take on the story. Very imaginative, a few spelling errors or typos here and there. Please watch your capitalization and spacing. Overall a good job.