Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Feel (emotions) (08/26/10)
TITLE: The Holy Tree
By Yvonne Leigh
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Carrying the basket becomes much easier as I grow in the strength of it, and it is my hope that it will eventually be my own identification. As I am transformed by the renewing of my mind, this fruit will replace the bad ones I picked up under other trees.
The wonderful, golden basket of precious fruit that I carry is fairly new to me. When I was growing up, the wounded souls around me poured the venom of their infections on me, and I learned how to deaden my heart to the hate. By this form of protection, I was able to function and learn in an imperfect, but sufficient manner. I also learned to love without being loved in return. As I matured and learned more about God, and about his Law; I was comforted by the familiarity of being loved if I pleased my authority. That was the carrot on the end of the stick that had always made me move forward; even though I knew I could never reach it. Conditional love is always a manipulation; never an attainable benefit; not at all like the basket of love I hold in my hand.
Headed for disaster, I wandered about, seeking my way, aimlessly. And then, along came Jesus! He is the personification of the unconditional love of God, and he redeemed me from the curse of the Law. Now, I know that I am loved because he is and not because of me and my failures or successes. Having the Holy Spirit from Jesus gives me this fruit of love to share with others; which I can do, but my heart is still anesthetized and needs to wake up. That takes more courage than I have been able meet. Because I was so successful at numbing my heart to hate, I cannot experience love. In my head, I know that God loves me because he did not withhold his only Son from me, but my heart canít feel it. However, God doesnít need anything from me to love me, and my faith moves because of his love, whether I feel it or not. Jesus is my perfection in my Fatherís eyes, and there is nothing I can do to perfect perfection.
There are times in a day that I look into the faces of anger, hate, despite, mourning, or worry. Busy people get impatient at times and become unkind and lose their tempers. These are the people whoíve been barking up the wrong tree and have found no relief from what bothers them. I carry the basket for them. I can go back for more; so I need to eat the fruit and hand the basket to someone Jesus died for.
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