Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Smell (the sense of smell) (07/29/10)
TITLE: Ode on a not-so-Grecian Nose
By Troy Manning
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I don’t like it when my nose gets red. Since I don’t drink all that much, it usually means I am cold when my nose is red. When I am too cold I sometimes get sick. I used to like when I got sick, but now that I am too old to go to school I don’t get sent home. When my nose is red and I am sick, I don’t smell good. When I don’t smell good I don’t know whether or not I have a stink.
I sometimes wonder if my nose is too big. I think bulbous is the word my mother used. I would rather have a round nose than a little pointy one though. I don’t know what good a pointy nose would be. If you have a pointy nose I am not purposely trying to offend you. I suppose it comes down to the old question between aesthetics and pragmatics. Your pointy nose might technically look better than mine, but I think mine is much more functional—especially when it comes to flowers. I once had a girlfriend with a small pointy nose, so, for Valentine’s Day, I gave her chocolates.
I once had a dream that I was an elephant. I was very upset when I woke up. You probably think I was upset because having a nose like an elephant would make me happy. If that were the case, I would be a very superficial person. It is true sometimes that more is better, but one’s happiness should never depend on nose size. If you have had a nose job I am not trying to offend you. There is nothing wrong with our trying to look the best we can within reason. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, so I am assuming you have had a reasonable nose job.
There is much more to be said on the subject of elephants, but perhaps just one more will suffice for now. I am not so sure that elephants can actually smell very well. I once tried to smell through a hose and all I smelled was rubber. While I love the smell of flowers, I hate the smell of rubber. And that, incidentally, is why I woke up screaming.
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