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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: The Writer's Life (05/13/10)

TITLE: A Bird's Eyeview
By Caitlyn Meissner


T’ings gets real dark when y’ been livin’ in de slammer all yer life. Y’ starts t’ wonder if there’s any such t’ing as freedom. At foist I had a couple a buddies around, talkin’, laughin’, and goofin’ off. With dem close by, I could almost forget de walls. Den one day de Warden hauls me off and locks me up in Solitary. I ain’t seen m’ pals since.

Now and den I starts t’ dream, and in m’ dreams I’m always flyin’ wild ‘n‘ free on dose Australian plains. But den I wakes up and remembers who I am, just a sad green parakeet livin’ in a cage.

Now, t’ings ain’t all rotten here in Solitary. I get m’ seed regular, plenty of fresh water, and clean newspapers twice a week. De Warden, well, he may be some kind of a scribbler, but he ain’t a bad character. Now and den he unbends enough t’ talk t’ me.

“Hello!” He says, fillin’ m’ seed cup. “Say ‘hello!’”

“Not on yer life,” I t’inks t’ m’self.

“You’ll talk one of these days,” he says.

“I’ll never talk, bub,” I t’inks. “Y’ can’t make me.”

“Some day,” he says, grinnin’.

I watch as he plops down before dat black box of his dat whirs and hums. His fingers start clickety-clackin’ up and down.

“Just wait,” I t’inks t’ m’self. “I’ll be free, no matter what.”

Next day, when de Warden brings m’ seed, I sidle up t’ de door, real phony friendly. As he reaches in for de cup, I takes a quick nip at his fingers.

“Ouch!” he yelps, yankin’ back his hand.

Yeah! With a glad squawk, I squeeze t’rough de door, spread m’ wings, and sail across de room.

“Hey, stop!” de Warden yells, givin’ chase.

“Y’ wish!” I t’inks, flappin’ toward a patch of blue sky. Almost dere….

Bam! De next t’ing I know, I’m down for de count, seein’ stars.

De Warden’s footsteps t’under across de floor, but all I do is sit and stare at de sky. It’s so close. I hop towards it. Again, somet’ing blocks de way. I stare at de t’ing, and peck at it, too. It ain’t wires. It’s clear and hard, keepin’ me inside.

Helpless, I turn t’ de Warden. He’s just standin’ dere, watchin’ me.

“It’s called a window,” he says, quite calm. “This may be my home, bird, but it is also my cage. In some ways, I’m no more free than you are.”

Den he plucks me up, real gentle, and drops me back in de slammer.

After dat I keeps watchin’ de Warden. Most days, he spends all his time writin’, only leavin’ now and den, as if lettin’ himself out for a short flutter.

Den one day he comes stompin’ back, slams down a pile of papers and says, “That’s it. I quit! No editor will ever publish my story.”

“Listen to this,” he says, starin’ at me, kind of wild. “Do you think I’ve wasted my time?”

Den he reads, “Caesar glared at Marcus, and said to his Praetorian Guard, ‘Throw him to the lions. If he will not praise me, he shall be prey. Do not pray for mercy; all such prayers are vain.’”

Now, I don’t know who dis Marcus guy is, but it comes t’ me dat he’s a part of de Warden’s dream, his way of escapin’ de cage, and dat t’ ditch him would be a cryin’ shame. But how t’ make him understand?

“Hello! Hello!” I squawk.

De Warden blinks. “You did it,” he whispers. “You spoke.”

Now dat I got his attention, I repeat a woid I hoid in his story. “Prey! Prey!”

He freezes.

“Prey! Prey!” I screech.

Den he starts t’ laugh, a laugh like a sob, and droppin’ t’ his knees he starts talkin’ t’ someone, someone I can’t see.

“Father,” he says, “Can this be true? Did I really just hear my parakeet say ‘pray’? Pray! Yes, Father, I will pray, and perhaps you’ll help me understand how to change my story.”

He sits quiet, den says t’ me, “Thank you. You’ve done more for me than you realize. Now I’ll do something for you.”

Den he sits down and writes, and as he writes he reads, “It was on a hot Australian morning that a small egg hatched and a young parakeet was born.”

And as he keeps writin’ I see m’self out dere, sailin’ across an endless blue sky.

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This article has been read 780 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Esther Phillips05/20/10
Oh, what a fun story. It took me a little bit to get it, but then I thoroughly enjoyed it. Good job!
Maria Egilsson05/20/10
I love the birds eye view! Interesting take on the subject. Fun read!
Mildred Sheldon05/20/10
What an imagination. I loved this from beginning to end. The title was frosting on the cake. Good job.
Gregory Kane05/20/10
This is excellent.
You handled the accent really well and I enjoyed the contrast between the various prisons.
Troy Manning05/21/10
Nice creative approach! Sounds like the parakeet's from the deep south.
AnneRene' Capp05/21/10
Wonderful imagination and such a fun read. If I had read anymore, think me's b talkn like dat!!
Caitlyn Meissner05/21/10
Actually, I think someone's been reading too many stories with New York accents. ;)
Lucile McKenzie05/23/10
A fun, creative piece. It was a while before I realized the narrator was a bird, but the message is loud and clear!
Amanda Brogan05/24/10
Aww, I love this story! :) Very well-written. It was very creative to tell the story from the bird's point of view. I adore his accent. ;)

I be perceivin' a purty lil' ribbon fer this piece. ;)
Virgil Youngblood 05/24/10
Great dialog and creativity.
Beth LaBuff 05/25/10
Aw.... as an animal lover, I "loved" this exchange between a parakeet and his writer. :) This warmed my heart!
Susan Montaperto05/26/10
This was very heartwarming. Thank you for a truly delightful story. This parrot truly had a lot to say. I enjoyed the interaction between the Warden and the parrot.
Joanna Stricker05/27/10
Congrats! Loved your piece!
Amanda Brogan05/27/10
Told ya you'd get another ribbon. ;) Congratulations!!!
Mona Purvis05/27/10
Miss Caitlyn can write! What an out-of-the-box wonderful story you told! I'm looking for more from you. I love your style. That's it. You have a solid style that reveals your work. Splendid.

Maria Kana Santos05/27/10
Congratulations! I enjoyed your piece very much. Well done.
Angela M. Baker-Bridge05/27/10
How creative! If I hadn't seen the author's name I would've bet this was by another FW known for her birds. So much fun here...Congrats~
K.D. Manes05/27/10
Congratulations! I t'ink 'Y'
have a gweat imag'wination! This was a fun read!
Patricia Turner05/27/10
WOW! I love your creativity and this sad green parakeet. Congratulations on a very captivating story and well deserved 1st place and EC!
Beth LaBuff 05/27/10
Congratulations, Caitlyn, for your ribbon and editor's choice award!!