Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Anger (01/24/05)
TITLE: Choose Your Words
By Charlayne Gray
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“UN, UN, AAAAA” I was trying to teach him that using words to express what he wanted more often got him what he desired, when it hit me that because he was angry, he was having a hard time remembering the words for his precious cookies and juice.
How often have I been in the throes of anger and resorted to blaming or screaming because I could not formulate the words swimming around in my head.
Anger. Red hot, steaming, sometimes a feeling of being out of control. That feeling of an eruption boiling up inside your chest, pressing to spew forth from your very being. How do we get to that point?
I know I get to that point by NOT using my words in the first place. Usually earlier in a conversation or confrontation we have an opportunity to say exactly what we mean or what we need. But out of courtesy, cowardice or “just trying to be nice” we avoid being specific in hopes that by our actions and what we are not saying, the other person will “get it.” Unfortunately that rarely ever works and before you know you’re in a heated battle of wills.
The word of God says let our “yea be yea and our nay be nay”. While we are not supposed to bull-doze over others with our wants and needs, we are called to speak the truth in love. By withholding the truth from others in order to keep the peace, we are just delaying a conflict. But if we speak the truth, in love, from the beginning, we allow the other person to act or react based on reality and not on a reality we allow them to create in their minds.
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