The Official Writing Challenge
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Very true. I can remember pulling barbies apart with my sisters, and now I know how frustrating car parks are!
I love the way you portrayed the sweet honesty of little children.
These days I am a governess to 11 children under ten and some of the cute things they say!
02/04/10
I loved your advice for when we feel the "GRRR"... what would Jesus do?
Fun read. Very clever and cute. Loved the dialogue too.
02/06/10
Your story is fun and flowing! I totally connected!
02/07/10
Good story, but when writing dialogue you must separate it so that the reader knows it's a different voice. That means in separate paragraphs. There are some writing forums on this site that could help you with that. Or try reading some of the stories in Master's for dialogue structure. Keep writing and practicing.
02/07/10
I like the way you turned the story back on yourself at the end - a timely and appropriate application.
In a number of places you swap back into the present tense, having written mostly in the past tense. This is something that Jan has been looking at in her Basics Class over in the Forums. This is a all-too-common mistake and I'm sure you'll find Jan has a lot of other good advice to help you with your writing.
02/07/10
Oh those little voices, they call it like they see it. I liked it very much.
02/11/10
Congrats on your highly commended award!
Congrats on the highly commended. You did a good job showing how tough it is to be a mom.