The Official Writing Challenge
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Thank you for sharing this story. I truly enjoyed this very much. We have many oops moments in life but isn't it wonderful how God turns oops moments into victorious ones. Keep writing and God bless.
I liked this entry better than mine. I like the fact that when you write, we learn something. The writing style flows smoothly, including the dialogue. I think I recognize this writing voice. Nice surprise ending too.

Oop. I talk too much.
01/22/10
Good dialogue, love the cultural info and the great message.
01/25/10
I enjoyed this story. I like the ending. It shows that even when we are not perfect, we can do something good for those around us.
I enjoyed this story too. But the word, "oops" was quite overused...a little distracting. But over all, your writing was good. Thank you.
01/26/10
Very good! I could really relate to your main character; she seemed quite real.

I've started a thread in the message boards specifically for Beginner and Intermediate writers, and I'd love to have you stop by. http://www.faithwriters.com/Boards/phpBB2/viewforum.php?f=67
Very nice story. Too bad Denise got sent home, but her disobedience might have gained a new Christian. Well done and congratulations.