After the blazing colors of a glorious fall, I’m adjusting to the early winter brownness of my surroundings as seen on the bare tree limbs and in the fields recently left bare and brown by the massive cotton pickers.
Just the brownness of the season leaves me feeling a little melancholy, and it seems that sad events seem sadder during this time -especially if something happens in your family and you need to help.
I want a bumper sticker that says, “I used to be a white knight, but I passed through lots of stuff riding to the rescue”. It’s a little wordy, but it makes a point.
I’ve been trying to rescue my younger brother for nearly thirty years. I’m a Brown Knight. I no longer have the shinny exterior of a true selfless White Knight. I’m weary and so is Jeffery. We long for him to catch a break.
Two Christmases ago a blood clot formed on Jeff’s left leg. After days in intensive care, the doctors were unable to dissolve the clot and in order to save his life they amputated his leg below the knee. This was at about the same spot they had amputated his right leg two years before. Last Saturday another clot formed on the left side of his face causing him to lose the sight in that eye. Never say things can’t get worse. Of course they can.
There is no point in asking, “Why?” That was done commendably in the book of Job. The bottom line seems to be that God can and will do as He pleases according to His purpose. While we Brown Knights are pondering and seeking a way to ride to the rescue, sometimes God will send a sign. A sign is not an answer, but it is something to hold on to.
After Jeffery’s second amputation I had a dream that was so vivid I knew it had a special meaning. I said, “Jeffery, let me tell you about the dream I had last night.”
He was heavilyly sedated, so I had a captive audience, and I continued,
“I was looking out over the fields of golden wheat behind our house when an enormous deer with huge tan antlers ran down the fence line to my right. I yelled for Dan, and we watched in amazement as the animal suddenly made a U turn and ran straight at us, leaped over our heads and landed in our living room. As it flew over, I smelled its muskiness and distinctly saw the course brown hairs on his hide glistening with sweat.
Totally ignoring our feeble attempts to herd him out the front door, the buck turned several full circles, tossed its mighty antlers and leaped out the window that had been opened the whole time. As I looked around the room, I could see that nothing had been broken.”
Jeffery had dozed off, but I continued to talk. “What do you think that means, Jeffery?”
Groggily, Jeffery uttered four words, “It’ a bad situation.”
“That’s it! The deer represents life situations. We’re observers as people all around us deal with their situations, but we never know when a serious situation will turn around and confront us. Good job Jeff.”
“But why would it jump out the window, when we couldn’t make it go out through the door.
Suddenly Jeffery grabbed my hand as he emitted a pain filled moan, “Pray”, he groaned.
“I will sweetie. Lots of people are praying for you. Those prayers are most likely the reason you are alive.”
Suddenly I knew the open window represented answered prayer. We cover our loved ones with prayer and then God provides an open window when a serious situation arises. All our attempts to control the situation are futile, but God has opened a window for a solution.
Day before yesterday Jeffery was unexpectedly given an opportunity to live in an assisted living facility. He had to make a difficult choice. As I talked to him on the phone, I gazed out the window and running down the tree line were three big, brown deer.
“Jeffery, you’ve been in a bad situation for a long time and God has just opened a window. Take that blessing.”
Today is rainy and cold, and it has a brown feel to it, but even so, I know God is listening to the prayers of His people and will always make a way for us in any situation.
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