The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
12/03/09
Pretty cute--and clever-- use of the topic.

I'm not positive about the rule for numbers-- are they supposed to be spelled out? (i.e.:seven instead of 7?)

I like the little extra information included-- like Clover purchasing his father-in-law a derby hat for Christmas. Fun stuff!
For a story about an arachnid, absolutely adorable! Can see it illustrated for a children's book. I'm glad Archie accepted his reclusive nature and that Clover respected it.

Other than several missing commas, very nicely written too! Good job!
What an adorable story. You have a vivid imagination and I enjoyed this immensely. Thank you and keep writing.
12/12/09
Oh, I agree, this should definitely be illustrated for a children's book!!!!!!!!!! Great job!!