Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Passport (07/25/05)
TITLE: The Passport To My Heart
By Tiffany Surla
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Years of pain and suffering come flooding back as I stand looking at a very tall mountain in front of me. There is a dark cloud that looms overhead and matches the darkness I feel so deep inside. I sit there quietly pondering about which direction I should take. There is so much that lingers before me - so many questions.
The biggest question I can’t seem to find the answer to is the never-ending, “Why me?” and, every time I ask I get the same dead silence – nothing but empty space that lingers as the thickness of a hot humid day in the deserts of Arizona. With one big sigh, and a nonchalant shrug of my shoulder, I stand up knowing what I must do.
I must go on. I can’t allow the pains and heartaches of my past to stop me from doing what I know I must do. I must continue to go forward. I hang my backpack on my shoulder and continue on my upward journey along the stony path. With each step of the journey the bag becomes heavier and the road, so it seems, becomes rockier. Just when I think I can't go on any further, I come to a fork in the road.
As I look to my left I notice that the road is longer, darker, and rockier than the one I just finished walking. When I look to my right I notice that the road is so smooth and springs of water are everywhere. As I continue looking there is a strong sense of peace that seems to beckon me. I begin walking towards it only to find myself running into a huge obstacle standing in my way. It is a huge wall. With no way over it and no way around it I drop down to my knees and cry out to the One who is able to remove this obstacle from my path. With a familiar gentleness I hear Him speak.
“My child, I have loved you with an everlasting love and with loving kindness I have drawn you to me. I have brought you to this place. That wall you are staring at is representative of the wall I stare at as I look into your heart. As you let that wall down, this wall will come down as well. You alone hold the passport which will allow me back into your heart.”
I then ask Him to reveal to me what that passport is. He tells me I will find the answer in my backpack. My backpack feels so heavy from the long journey and I struggle to lift it and place it in front of me. Slowly I open it. I am shocked by what I see.
Big, giant rocks loom up at me from the darkness. I begin to pull the rocks out one by one. Each one has sharp, jagged edges and the deeper into the bag I go, the sharper they become. It becomes hard for me to remove them from the bag without causing injury to myself. Without Him saying a word, I suddenly know what they are.
Each one of these rocks represents a jagged region of my heart that I have allowed to harden over time. As I lift each one and set it to the side, I begin to pray, forgive, and ask forgiveness. I begin to feel my heart soften and, to my amazement, the wall that loomed before me begins to crumble right before my eyes.
As I pull the last rock out, I rejoice because I can feel His smile! He is so near and His love is so overwhelming. I listen intently as He whispers, “You see, My Child, the passport to my heart is faith, hope, and forgiveness – all summed up in one word: Love!”
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