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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Car Trip (07/18/05)

TITLE: The wages of sin
By giuseppe silvestro
07/18/05


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The darkness of night swept along the desert highway illuminated only by a half moon with dancing stars dotting its eternal blackness. Mitch drove with a determined consciousness. He sped with veracity as he passed a well-lighted bill board sign bidding him farewell from Las Vegas. “It’s not my fault. She asked for a ride. I didn’t force her to get in the car.” He moaned. Mitch wiped the sweat from his upper lip and left a trail of blood on his face. His hand was still covered with her blood. She asked for it.” His voice trailed off with a whimper.
Mitch continued to drive. “Why did I let her in my car.” He cried. Mitch saw the woman standing in the middle of the road. Her body covered in blood. Mitch swerved into the other lane. “But I dumped her to the side of the road.” He groaned.
Mitch’s heart beat with the rhythm of a warrior’s drum. His mind flashed back. She wore a dress of silken fabric. It was white and her long curls of blond hair draped down her back. “Can you give me a ride. I need to leave him.” “Sure. She smiled and stepped in the car.
“You’re beautiful.” Mitch said. “Are you running from your husband?” Mitch asked. She said nothing. She turned to him while fumbling through her purse. “Do you want me?” She whispered. Mitch smiled and sang, “Sure!” “Pull over.” Mitch pulled the car over into an empty lot. The woman turned facing Mitch with her legs bent on the front seat and the other on the floor. Mitch smiled with lips plump with desire. “Do you love me?” She asked with a child’s pout.” “Ya” he giggled. “Do you believe in God?” She asked as her hand moved in her purse. “What?” Mitch asked. “Do you?” “I’m not really sure.” She pulled out a dark object from her purse and held it at bay in the shadows that crept in the car’s darkness. “Come here.” She whispered. He placed his open mouth on her lips as he moaned.” He touched her body and leaned his weight onto her. “You’re raping me?” She muttered. “What!” Mitch cursed. He pulled back his body from her as she lifted her arm with a loaded gun in her hand.
Mitch opened his mouth but no sound spat from his trembling mouth. “You’re just like my husband. You think you can just take what you want and then leave when you’re finished.” She cocked the pistol and said, “Good bye.” Mitch grabbed her gun as she pulled the trigger. He twisted her hand around till the bullet shot from the barrel and lodged into her head. Blood splattered on the window. Mitch cried, “Oh my God.” Mitch looked around to see if anyone was present but not one sign of life stirred in hot summer night. He pushed open his door and ran to side of the car. He opened the door as her body fell backwards out of the car. He dragged her body behind a pile of garbage bags.
He had been driving for 20 minutes and now he had seen her again. He drove, as he looked further down the road. He saw her again. He slammed on the brakes and she stood in front of the vehicle. Blood covered her body. “Do you want me?” Her hoarse voice asked. Mitch closed his eyes in disbelief but a moment later he opened his eyes and she was gone. He tore off down the road as a semi-truck sped down the other lane. “Do you want me?” Her hoarse voice screamed as Mitch looked in the rearview mirror to find her in the car. She covered his eyes as his vision went black. Mitch swerved into the other lane as the semi-truck smashed into his car shredding it to pieces. “Jesus save me!” He cried as his car burst into flames. All went black for Mitch as the car exploded and his lust subsided for good. Death has been paid in full.


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Member Comments
Member Date
Nina Phillips07/26/05
That was a deep and dark "well" to drink from. Very sombre, and eerie feel to your story. Fitting. God bless ya, littlelight
Shirley Thomas07/26/05
WOW! Creative writing from a different angle..from the dark side. Thanks for sharing your talent.
Bronwyn Johnson07/27/05
Good writing, very figurative, but I'm not sure what point you are trying to make. God bless you always!
Beth Muehlhausen07/29/05
Painful stuff, and haunting. That last-minute cry sounded just like the thief on the cross to me.......