The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Heartfelt rendering of a personal memoir. :)
11/30/08
I don't know if this really happened but it certainly rang true. You explored a good range of emotions and your ending sounded authentic to my ears. Well done. I won't say 'enjoyable' because there's a little too much pain and sorrow for that. But very satisfying otherwise.
12/02/08
Your writing really shines when you add your personal feelings to the narrative. I like the dialog, too; let us hear your characters speak more! And breaking up long paragraphs, would give your important sentences more punch.

I love this tribute to your Aunt Joan. It flows well, and your writing skill is evident. The beginning caught my heart, and the ending left me with a hopeful peace. Very strong entry!!
12/04/08
Congratulations on your Highly Commended award, Micheline. Well done. With love, Deb (Challenge Coordinator)
05/13/09
I agree with Catrina- the emotions involved in the narrative were terrific :)