The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
10/10/08
A lovely original Christmas carol--thanks so much!

I love that the meter is different from the usual 8,6,8,6 meter of lots of poetry--but your 3rd line sometimes tripped me up in its rhythm. Just a bit of figiting with it might make the poem flow more smoothly.

I liked this a great deal.
This is a lovely carol, and your use of slant rhyme is well-done.
Most of your longer lines have eleven syllables, but a few have twelve, and I confess that I did not try to detect the meter.
I, too, like your use of this less common rhyme scheme.
I enjoyed your poem on the first Christmas Carol.
10/13/08
This is a beautiful poem on the first Christmas carol. I especially like how you told the story of the first carol sung by angels at Jesus' birth, but moved on to a lovely reminder that this same Jesus is soon to come again and that we should be alert and watching.
This was right on topic!
Nice job stating the purpose of Jesus' birth in poem form. Excellent writing. :)