The Official Writing Challenge
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Oh my. I have to admit, I did not like this at all--but I do realize there's much more to life than sunshine and flowers. I was confused through many parts of this, but other parts were very well done. You succeeded in gaining my great sympathy for the little girl. Very great indeed!
I, too, must admit confusion about most of this writing. I felt as if I had been given a few paragraphs from several different spots in a forty- chapter novel. Many, many words, but to me - little clarity. Maybe, after others comment, I will begin to see what I, obviously, missed. Success with your writing. :)
Once again God taught me a lesson. Read and don't be quick to judge! I am often hesitant when reading some of the entries skipping to and fro only thinking of my self and my entry. This stories comments intriged me. I had gotten it, so I read it again and again. I hate horror, but this was so good. The little girl stumbled upon her estranged (and strange) fathers evil liar, his shrine of her mother and a voodoo type set up. I got shivers. I also loved the adult, very wordy tone which kept the mystery and evil so hidden. Like our adversary that prowls around waiting for us to slip up. Keep one eye open!
Your final point about whether the child would be believed is so vital in this scenario. Well said. It's happening all around us.