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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Beach (07/04/05)

TITLE: The Haunted Shore of Gerasenes
By J. C. Lamont
07/06/05


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The shore of Gerasenes was not the lovely beach couples strolled upon in the cool of the evening, nor was it where children played in the afternoon sun.

The avoidance wasn’t due to the vehement waves that crashed against the jagged rocks jutting up along the sand. It wasn’t the ominous cliff that loomed above the shore, like a premonition, warning travelers not to linger. It wasn’t even the foreboding graveyard, high upon the cliff, whose white sepulchers stood up against the skyline as an omen of death.

It was what lurked in the graveyard.

A creature, described in farce, as so savage and so vile, that tourists assumed it was just a local myth. A legend concocted by fisherman in an attempt to haunt the townspeople’s dreams.

But it was neither myth nor legend.

As the shadows of dusk fell across the beach, as the moon cast its evanescent glow on the battered rocks, as the wind whipped through the graves, a forlorn shriek could be heard from among the tombstones. As though conjured by the powers of darkness, the shrieks rose to high-pitched wails. Screams of torment. Cries of anguish.

A streak of lightening lit up the graveyard and the creature, a man, could be seen from behind a sepulcher. Straggly hair hung past his shoulders in knotted clumps. Self inflicted wounds marred his naked body as blood from open gashes glistened in the moonlight. Mutilated and disfigured from burns, shackles, and rocks, the creature uttered another screech into the howling wind.

A torrent of rain burst from the black clouds above and thunder rattled the ground. The man half crawled, half staggered over to the cliff and looked down at the beach. Swirls of angry foam plunged onto the shore, smashing into the jagged rocks below. He looked out on the raging waters and saw a boat rocking perilously in the storm.

Lightening flashed again and the creature added another menacing shriek to the violence of nature around him. But this time he heard another voice beyond his own. Though unable to make out the words, the voice sounded hauntingly familiar and the man recoiled in horror.

The storm came to an abrupt halt. The wind died. The downpour stopped. The waves ceased their ravaging onslaught.

As terror reverberated through his soul, the creature watched the boat arrive safely to shore and its passengers clamber onto the beach.

“What do you want with me?” the man shrieked. But his voice was no longer his own. It was a deep, guttural sound that emanated from within him.

He scrambled down the rocky cliff, falling, sliding, scraping himself against the rocks. His calloused feet plunged into the wet sand as he stumbled along the beach.

“I know who you are!” he hissed. “Have you come to torture me before it is time?”

The man to whom he spoke looked through him, past the mutilated and disfigured body, past the eyes, and into the soul, into the red eyes of evil that stared back at him.

“What is your name?” the man asked.

“Legion,” the deep voice answered. “For we are many.”

“Leave him,” the man commanded.

The man fell to the ground in violent convulsions as the faint sounds of scraping talons and rustling wings echoed into the night.

Early morning dawn sent streaks of pink and gold across the beach as the man, now dressed, stood on the shore alone and watched the boat drift back across the waters. He locked eyes with the man who had spoken to him, who had given him the robe that now clothed him, who had rescued him from the demons which had tormented his soul for years.

Gentle waves lapped at his feet. A cool breeze kissed his face.

For the first time, the shore of Gerasenes was a beach where children could play, where couples could walk hand in hand, and one man would remember as the place his soul was set free.


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This article has been read 1054 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Amy Brown07/11/05
I was 3/4 of the way through before I clued in. Great description. It's healthy to retell the familiar, so that we don't become numbed to the message. Well done.
Debra Brand07/11/05
I liked this story. Good reader involvement so that I could envision the setting.
Michelle Burkhardt07/11/05
Nice way to re-tell an old story...I enjoyed it.
Kyle Chezum07/11/05
Awesome! This one deserves a win.
Crista Darr07/12/05
ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC! I agree, this is a winner! Great work!
Nina Phillips07/12/05
I don't really know if it was the way you wrote this, or the actual message involved--but I actually had compassion for the creature (person) that you presented. Good writing. God bless ya,
littlelight
Linda Watson Owen07/13/05
Absolutely beautiful! Thank you!
Shari Armstrong 07/15/05
Very nice! :)
Beth Muehlhausen07/15/05
Your ability to build suspense kept me wondering for quite a while! This is a wonderful and graphic way to tell this familiar Biblical story. Very powerful. Good job!
Karen Deikun07/17/05
Most creative! A great take on the subject of "beach" - certainly unexpected, and nicely developed.
Amy Michelle Wiley 07/17/05
Very creative peice. I liked the discriptions. I once wrote a story from the point of view of Legion's fictional son, so it was interesting to see the story from this perspective. Well written!
Maxx .07/17/05
Very very good. Top 8 worthy. And you're in intermediate why? I'm sure we'll see you up a notch soon.
Alyssa Colby07/18/05
This is a really well-written story. I like the merging of the calming of the storm with the scene of the demoniac. Never thought of them going together (though of course they do in the Bible) or that maybe the demoniac SAW Jesus calm the storm, which is entirely possible. Thanks for presenting this story in a fresh way. (only what about the pigs?...)
Deborah Porter 07/18/05
JC, wonderful to see you back in the Challenge again, and congratulations on your 2nd place in the Level 2 awards and 5th place in the Editor's Choice. Well deserved on both counts. The way you ended this actually sent shivers up my spine. It was just beautiful. Again, well done! With love, Deb (Challenge Coordinator)
Deborah Porter 07/18/05
Oops ... should have also mentioned that with these wins behind you, it's time to move up to Level 3. Love, Deb