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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: The Family Pet (05/15/08)

TITLE: Comforting Cat
By Nate Weil
05/16/08


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I have lived with a variety of pets, from hamsters to goldfish to birds to cats to dogs and have given all of them a lot of time and love. Cats especially have been the common pet in the house, we have had at least one cat the whole way through, while the other pets have come and gone. But more importantly, one of the cats that has made it through the fourteen years of my life as a loved family pet is the one I have always loved the most. Just an ordinary looking white tabby with one big grey spot on his back, on the inside in some wonderful way he is different. Whenever I had a problem and I had to go somewhere alone and quiet to sulk over it, he would come up to me with his persistent meowing, insisting that I pick him up and pet him. And telling him out loud what problem I was dealing with, and hearing him purr and meow as if he knew exactly what I was saying and agreeing, that did more than any human can do. And after talking with him, I would realize that my problem really wasn't that bad, and I would be able to face the world again. They say dogs are man's best friend, but as for me, it has been, is, and always will be, cats.


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This article has been read 309 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Susan Storm Smith05/22/08
I suggest that you focus on sentence structure. The over use of "and" throughout the short piece is overkill. Try to use other words and redefine the senteces with the use of commas, or substitute words.

Very nice theme, just gets lost in the "and".
Joshua Janoski05/23/08
I enjoyed hearing about your cat.

Don't be afraid to use your full 750 word count to tell your story. I was yearning to hear more about you and your relationship with your cat.

Also, there are some punctuation errors (missing commas, etc..) that can be easily fixed to make your piece even better.

Thank you for sharing this. :)
Joanne Sher 05/23/08
I would love to have more detail, but I loved what you did have to say. My cat is exactly the same way.