The Official Writing Challenge
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A fun read, and I do believe I detect more than a hint of satire. Excellent.
This was a favorite--creative, amusing, and with a message.
Ahhh a case of 'art imitating life' or perhaps a modern day parable. This was extremely enjoyable. It was well written and I loved the voice. Well done, very well done indeed.
You did such a great job on this! It was such a pleasant read!
Great story! I loved the symbolism of the father showing up unexpectedly, looking as stern as a judge.

I hope to see this on the winners' list.

One comment: words like Mr. and St. get periods after them.
What a day these brothers had, I am guessing there were many more like this.
"Play nicely" was perfect, how many times did we all hear that growning up.

Is there a sequel in the works? It would be a run read too.
I enjoyed reading this. I love when the boys were arguing and the one brother says, "We believe in salvation by grace." Hearing children argue like this reminded me of "The Lord of the Flies."

One question that I had at the end of the story was how were the boys supposed to build sand castles in their rooms?

Nice job.
I loved the satirical tone of this piece. You demonstrated a real problem with the church in such a way that it was fun and engaging for the reader.

I hope this one places high, because it is exceptionally good in my opinion. Thank you for sharing! :)
I loved this. You have wonderful descriptions, also. Great job!
ROFL! So much happening here between these two brothers! I had to chuckle at some of the words tossed back and forth between them. My only note, was that I wasn't sure how much time was passing. ^_^ Otherwise, good job!
Creative and fun!
Oh, FUN! And truly masterfully done. This is amazingly clever with a touch of wit and more than a touch of sarcasm. VERY well done!
Wonderful article! Excellent, imaginative frame for a very relevant commentary.
My favorite part was the prayer for ice cream, nice touch :).

I think my only nits are these:
I kind of lost track of time and thought several days had passed.
This line: "You’ve been baptised, so why don’t you play a nice game, like Church" as the logical transition behind the commentary it made sense, but as part of the article it made me stumble a little.

Nonetheless, outstanding entry, I loved it...
This was super fun to read...I loved it.
I too detected a bit of satire in this fun read. I love the message you wove into this story. Well done.
Congratulations on your 1st place. I really like the satire in this piece. Great job with the topic.
Congrats on 1st place James, good story, I loved the ending.
One word comes to mind after reading this story - alegory (I think it's spelled correct?) While I was laughing at the brothers' antics I was also feeling sad about the state of Christ's church today. It truly is divided. You did an excellent job creatively while addressing such an important topic.