The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
You've shown clearly how the pain some siblings go through together makes a bond that is never dissolved. Thank you for sharing a bit of your heart.
05/08/08
A very tender reminiscence.

I'd have liked to know the gender of the narrator sooner. And consider re-working the 4th paragraph in 1st person rather than 2nd.

Lots to know here--looks like you have plenty of stories in you!
05/09/08
You related your pain so well, but maybe you could give the reader a little more information as relates to the first paragraph. Thank you for sharing your story.