The Official Writing Challenge
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Good details in this piece.

I got a bit lost in a few places - you seemed to jump from one character's point of view to another fairly quickly. A good suggestion for a shorter piece is to tell it from only one character's point of view. It could just be me, though.

Keep writing - very engaging descriptions.
Keith showed remarkable restraint!

I had to backtrack a bit to keep track of who was who, and who was doing what.

I love the alliteration in your title.

A good story but I'm not to sure of the ending. It was almost like the MC had kept it in his heart all those years waiting for the "thank you". The "action" of love could have continued, looked like an opportunity to me with the brother Billy. Good job, keep writing.
This story gave me chills as Keith went to save Michael. Poor Billy, though. He must have been tormented by that day.
I loved the line "It was like the arm of God extended to them." Great idea to illustrate the topic. Can't wait to read more! Mocha