The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/22/08
Good job of putting us in your main character's head.

I wish you had given her a name...using the pronoun "she" throughout was a little bit disorienting.

Sad ending, but I'm glad you didn't tie it all up in a pretty bow...this was more poignant and to the point.
A very good description at the beginning; I was about to reach for that lemonade. I also liked how you both began her withdrawl, and her recognition of that withdrawl, with the title.

I hadn't really noticed the lack of a name until Jan pointed it out, but for me, it just gave it a very universal sense, of being able to happen to anyone, in any church.
02/23/08
Right on target! "Well done, my good and faithful servant!" This entry reminds me of that statement Jesus made...and it is very well written. I enjoyed the read immensely, and learned from it. Nicely done.
02/23/08
Much to ponder here - your MC's character was very, very complex. I appreciated that especially. (I also wish she'd had a name - to each his own, huh?)

Nicely done.
02/26/08
It's sooo easy to do what we do for God and want some praise--or at least some thanks-- this story is warning to someone out there who is fed up. We need to keep our eye on the prize of the high calling of God in Jesus Christ!
Congratulations on getting "Highly Commended" this week.

I like the point you made that serving God shouldn't be about the recognition, but rather the joy it brings to other people and to the Lord.

Keep up the great writing!