The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Good job with the authentic dialogue and setting.
Nice job of showing both sides of the topic, those who escalated revenge, and Mallorie realizing when it was time to break the cycle of violence.
Excellent page-turning type writing, with an intriguing twist and turn, plus a good moral at the end. I thoroughly enjoyed the creative read, the story itself, the title, and the constant mystery that managed to skirt around the edges throughout...luring the reader on to the finish line. A triple Kudos!
Good sense of place and nice job on the dialog. Enjoyed this read.
Interesting story held my attention. I am wondering, however about the relationship between Jimmie and Mallorie. Were they childhood friends? Brothers? Also a few more commas here and there would smooth out the read.
Especailly like the mountainous cop. Keep up the good words.
Pretty good! The dialouge between them was realistic and I liked the character of Mallorie. I'm assuming that they were brother/sister? Friends? They seemed closer. I liked how the cop at the end turned out to be someone she knew from church. Just a tip: It helps sometimes to put the prayers, or thoughts in italics, so that the reader is sure that it isn't said aloud. Otherwise, good job-and I really liked the title! ^_^
I was drawn into your story with your dialog. It's sad sometimes that "name calling" is all it take to set off this kind something like you've described. You've definitely hit the topic, and I liked the way you came at it, from the angle of NOT cutting off your nose. Good work on this.