The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/10/08
Great message!
I wonder if it would benefit from being simplified a bit - you had quite a few sub-plots, as it were, and in a short piece, I think the focus perhaps needs to be tighter. Keep writing.
01/10/08
Lots to chew on in this little sermon. Good work.
01/11/08
Lots of truth here--you really researched and thought this out.

At times I had a hard time following it--as if it needed to be more finely focused.