The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
12/13/07
My pen refuses to go red ;) I truly felt like I was right there. I love the dialog - especially in the early part. Lovely.
Wow! A very gripping story. It caught me by surprise. Very well done.
12/14/07
Wow!! I really liked this piece. It pulled me in and made me want to keep reading.
12/16/07
Ahhhhh ... what a delightful story. You grabbed me from the beginning and kept me reading, wanting to uncover the mystery of her strange surroundings. Great work! Christmas blessings! :)
12/16/07
How perfect for The Church! I want to dance and weep with joy with Margaret! Just lovely. Well done!
12/16/07
From the brilliant title to the teary-eyed end...Super!! When you started listing the names of her brothers and sisters...I burst into tears - For they are my family also. You can always tell a great writer from the emotion they evoke out of their reader. Kudos!
12/17/07
Unbelievably precious.
12/18/07
Oh my. I guess everybody already said it all. I do hope, though, that we're a little less clueless when we get there...
12/18/07
Wonderfully imaginative and it gripped me from beginning to the end. Beautiful glimpse of what might happen.
12/18/07
Lovely! I love descriptions of Heaven and how we will feel when we get there. You did a tremendous job of portraying the characters and setting.
12/18/07
Very well done. One of the sections you get high points for in the challenge is the opening, and this didn't hook me as much as it could have. Something like this would grab me more: Margaret caught her breath against the icy wind and hugged her arms into the folds of her coat and body. Just writing about her locking the door and taking something off the counter doesn't need to be told, as we need to live through her in the story, and locking doors is automatic. That's where the show not tell rule comes in. If you really want her to lock the door and mention the angle tree, then you could talk about her reluctance to take her hand out of the coat pocket for fear of it hardening into icicle rigidity like the key in her hand, and then put her hand back into the pocket to feel the ridges of the angel tree.
12/19/07
Nice one word title. This stands out. I like the you-are-there atmosphere on this piece. Great job.

RED PEN: I think a little too much detail in the beginning, I thought the Angel Tree was important with where she was going, but it isn't mentioned after the first few paragraphs, otherwise, it was great!
12/19/07
Wow! Well done!
RED PEN:
I suggest that you end with the line, "Well done, my good and faithful Margaret."
The rest was anti-climatic.

Good writing.
12/19/07
I'm writing this with tears in my eyes. You so beautifully captured those first moments of eternity with our Father. Very nice job with the topic.
12/20/07
Well done, good and faithful one. Beautiful piece that is a keeper for sure.
Congratulations, this is a very well deserved FIRST place! So wonderful! Keet it up.
12/20/07
Congratulations on your first place! This is one of my favorites this week.
12/21/07
You KNOW I'm grinning ear to ear. And 12th overall! You know how much I love this - congrats, my best bud. :)
This is so beautiuful. I really enjoyed this story and you kept my interest throughout. Well done!
The story is wonderful and the tone feels soft throughout, even when she is confused. The dialogue with the Light stirs my heart as I long to hear those words.
Congratulations on your 1st place!