The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/15/07
Very good at bringing this Bible story to life!

I'd have liked a break from the dialogue every now and then...some descriptions of the two men's actions, their surroundings, etc. It helps the reader to more accurately visualize what's happening. And when you describe actions, you can add to the emotional content of the piece--having Saul pace, or slam a cup onto the table, for example.

You're right on topic with this "you are there" story--thanks!
11/17/07
I enjoyed reading your perspective of Biblical events in this piece.
Good story...makes me wonder how much of John Mark is in all of us.