The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 444 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
09/16/07
Very romantic, almost idyllic, lovely to read.

You story was very dialogue-heavy, and I sometimes lost track of the speakers. A few descriptive phrases every so often might help to orient us. Also helpful would be spaces between paragraphs--tricky on FaithWriters, but an extra "enter" should do the trick.

A nice story for fans of romance.
09/19/07
I like the characters in this romantic tale. I did have a little bit of trouble keeping the dialog straight, also. More spaces as Jan suggested will polish this nice story and make it shine!
A good romance.