The Official Writing Challenge
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08/23/07
Good story, but either I was reading to fast and overlooked it, but what was it that caused the young man's eyes to be opened that day? He seemed to know alot about what happens to the believer when they start trusting God, but what was his Epiphany so to speak.
08/24/07
I like the title, the message and the wisdom spoken by the old man.
The punctuation threw me a little bit. You may need to check it before you submit, but I'm not one to throw stones. Took me a little while before I got what the younger guy was on about, but you rounded it off well in the end. Good stuff.
08/24/07
Title is great, the message is sound, although the story line became somewhat confused (at least to me). Pretty good work. This will fit nicely in the puppy pen.
08/24/07
How totally delightful! God's love surpasses human logic any day!
08/26/07
This was delightful! I loved Paul's enthusiasm and could sense Tom's patient love for the younger man.

Like others, the punctuation threw me off. You really need to look for where a comma should have been, especially in the spoken sentences. i.e. "Tell me what happened, Paul." Tom says. That should have been a comma after Paul.

One suggestion would be to leave it for a day then come back and make sure it all makes sense a day later.

You have a fantastic ear for writing conversations! You'd be surprised how difficult this can be. Keep going!
08/27/07
You definitely have a talent for dialog and characterization. This was a joy to read.
08/31/07
Congratulations, Samuel. Your entry has placed 15th in Level 2. The Lists for the Top 15 in each Level and the Top 40 overall is available in the Weekly Results and Highest Rankings forum of our Faithwriters Message Boards.