The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 447 times
Member Comments
Wow, that was sad. I normally can't even get into poems, but, man. That was really good. Saying that I "liked it alot," just doesn't seem to be the correct response for something so close to the heart and sad, but it was very good. Well-written and heart-filled. Oh, and, uh, sorry dude.
Your poem has a lilting quality that grows with each reading.
Captures the topic well. The poem flows well, and the feelings in the poem are clearly stated.

There are a couple places in the poem where you could have used puncutation to gain emphasis.

Also the word "awaked" I would have replaced with "awoke"... but then language varies from one place to another and that may just be a difference for that reason.

Overal all great job. I did enjoy the poem.
Wow, you've really exposed your soul here! Very moving.

Work on making your meter more consistent, to give your poem a smoother flow.

If this is true, and she's really your soul mate--go get her back!
A real interesting tale. Try to be more consistant with your line lengths, as well as the meter by counting syllables.
The story is truly a good read. God Bless,