The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
07/27/07
I couldn't imagine any worse incident at a wedding! But this would make a good start for a romantic story, if you wanted to expand it. :)
You did a good job of bringing the reader into the church scene. I foresaw what was coming with the name confusion and wanted to drag your poor MC out of the church before she could go through with her plan.
Ouch! I was embarrassed for the bride, the MC, the groom...everyone. This is a good writing. You nailed the topic.
07/31/07
Oh! I wanted to crawl into a cave for her!! How horrible! You did an EXCELLENT job conveying her feelings and the feel of it. Wonderful!! :-) hugs!!
07/31/07
At first I was shocked and embarrassed for her at what she said the the bride, then when she looked at the groom, ugh! Very well told, lots of feeling - I enjoyed it!
07/31/07
Yikes! I was embarrassed just reading this, so you really nailed it!
08/01/07
Your portrayal of her emotions was PERFECT - you definitely nailed it! I did not in ANY way see the ending coming. Great job!
08/01/07
I enjoyed reading this -- and wanted to yell "stop" as Kathie was having her tirade. I was totally embarrassed for her.

I noticed your first 6 paragraphs all started with the same word -- Kathie. You may want to work on putting some variety into the beginning of each paragraph.

Great job with the topic.
Well, it certainly was a disaster. I can't think anything much more embarrassing. You captured your MC's feelings well. Kudos.
08/01/07
Yep, that would be a wedding disaster. You captured the emotions well here, a great story telling for sure. I kind of held my breath reading, I was that captivated.
08/02/07
If you can make so many of us (myself included) want to crawl into a tiny whole along with your MC, that's a sign of good writing. (A bit crowded here though.)
Makes me wonder if there'll be a happy ending in your sequel. ;)
Well done.