Remember Art Linkletter’s “Kids Say the Darndeth Things”. You never see it coming. You’re in the grocery store with young daughter, barely listening to her endless questions, trying to remember what items you need, when a comment/question is shouted to get your full attention; “Mom I sure do love bacon. Where does bacon come from?”
Casually, not seeing where your answer was going to take you, you reply, “It comes from pork, Dear.”
So far, so good. But another question is about to follow.
“Pork? Where does pork come from, Mama?”
(Watch it, you’re about to traumatize your child.) But your brain never gets the warning.
“Well, pork is another word for pigs, Sweetheart.”
Suddenly you realize this was the wrong time and place to share that piece of information. It never dawned on you that she didn’t know where meat came from.
You hear this response, loud enough to get the attention of the other shoppers in the store:
“Pigs!!! You don’t mean dead ones, do you?!!!”
You turn. Oh, the look on her face. She didn’t know.
Caught off guard you say the first thing that comes into your mind, “Well, dear, of course they’re dead.”
“You’ve been feeding me pieces of dead pigs ?!!” she screams.
For a moment you actually feel ashamed of yourself. Then you realize how good bacon taste and why you’re always buying a new pack when you go shopping.
I had broken one of the Mother’s Cardinal rules. Listen carefully, before you answer. It might be important.
“I’m NEVER going to eat bacon again!!!” states the newest vegan in the world.
“From now on, when you and Daddy eat bacon, you just give me sausage.”
“Lord, please don’t let her ask the next question till we get home.”
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