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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Write in the POETRY genre (05/17/07)

TITLE: Because I Care
By Victoria Weathers
05/17/07


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Because I care, I dared to stand right there in your way
I put our relationship on the line
Trying urgently to block a perilous bypass

For I have traveled the very road which calls to you
A road filled with deceiving images
Troubled for you, in prayer I toss and turn on my bed

Because I care, I dare to speak and warn of things in store
As pride takes you further away from truth
And deceitfully an angel of light whispers, “Come.”

Ever so skillfully, you’re distracted from your fate
So sure I’m too ancient to understand
Spellbound by his trap just as he premeditated

Because I care, I dare to tell someone who can help
If I can’t reach you maybe this one can
I can not merely watch you naively wreck your soul

I can’t sit back and allow you to destroy yourself
No matter how mad it makes you at me
Because the love of Christ compels me to make a stand

Because He cares and I’m His, through me He calls to you
He wants to give you a future and hope
“Lord, use me! Whether it be my voice, a look, my life”

He reaches through time and space to save your drifting heart.
Who am I? A mere rescued soul.
Just like you, I was rescued from pride’s deep deception.

He placed someone in my path to stand, to speak and to tell
Though I did not welcome it at the time
I am so glad He found someone willing to be used.

I am forever changed! I am still being rescued.
I will even risk losing our friendship.
Because I truly…but even more He truly cares.


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This article has been read 415 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Rhonda Clark 05/24/07
Good work.

But, I didn't get this one, sorry. Maybe someone else will, poetry isn't my strong suit.
Marilyn Schnepp 05/25/07
I guess one would call this prose (the un-rhymed type of poetry)...I am a little dense at times and don't always get the point. It's Not the author's fault,however...it's mine. So consider the source, and smile! You met the challenge!
Dee Yoder 05/26/07
Your poem is a good description of a Christian's wake-up call to a friend. We may have to risk the relationship sometimes, in order to sound a warning.
Sandra Petersen 05/26/07
This is beautiful and an excellent message. Anyone who says they are a true believer should be the type of mentor the narrator of your poem is.

Two little things that I noticed (but didn't detract from the message):

In this line "Ever so skillfully, you’re distracted from your fate" I knew you meant Satan was very skillful at distracting the young believer, but it almost sounded as if the young believer was the one who was being skillful.

This line "Just like you, I was rescued from pride’s deep deception" sounds as if the young believer has been rescued already but the whole concept of the poem is that the young believer NEEDS rescuing before it is too late.

I loved these lines:
"For I have traveled the very road which calls to you
A road filled with deceiving images," and

"He placed someone in my path to stand, to speak and to tell
Though I did not welcome it at the time
I am so glad He found someone willing to be used."

Those two places made me think. Thanks for sharing.
Kenn Allan05/26/07
I'm always impressed by those who can write freestyle poetry. This piece is no exception - ESPECIALLY since it was done with 3-line stanzas. And the message is one encountered by all Christians at one time or another. Well done.
Tracy Walshaw05/27/07
This work really touched the "mother's heart" in me, reminding me of how, if we have children, we most likely will face this battle with at least one child, and how hard it will be but how we must have great courage. Excellent work.
Jacquelyn Horne05/28/07
Very good thought here. Standing in the gap.
Donna Emery05/28/07
Very, very good. This is a great story of someone who's "been there" and who wants to save a friend from a similar fate. Very good