The Official Writing Challenge
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A nice twist on the Biblical story. The explanations in parenthesis might have flowed better just spelled out, unless in a longer piece and it's worked in to explain the abbreviations, maybe through dialog (which are quite often used in SciFi -especially military SciFi). I liked the line about the open arms, open house, but a closed heart.
Hehe, fun twist on a familiar story.
I enjoyed the storyline. Good job. God bless.
Very, very creative. Enjoyed this short, sweet and to the point biblical story set in a sci fi arena. The Commander and his 12 aliens - thought it brilliant!
This is so creative. I would have been in the dark until the end, except for the names Martha and Mary. (^8^)
I, too, really liked the line about the open house but closed heart. I like your clever twist, putting the Bible account into a futuristic scenario.