The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date

A nice poem, with a message. Be sure to check your spelling; also check for 'extra clutter' words, or words not needed.

Keep writing, and God Bless,

05/06/07
An allegory, a fable, and a poem, all wrapped up in one tidy package!

Work on consistency of meter to give your poem more polish.
05/08/07
Matched couplets are tough, you made the grade there, but watch your prosody and spelling. You're on the right track. Keep writing.