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Obedience or Desire
He swept me off my feet. I was never the same after that first encounter with my new love. There was no need to resist any longer. My husband would be furious at this major change in my life, but what I found in my new love was pure and right and more real than anything I’d known through thirty-nine years of living. I hoped beyond hope that my husband would understand and begin a new romance of his own with the One I just met.
While some of my friends who knew Him spoke of obediently spending ‘alone time’ with Him every morning, my time with Him was never out of obedience. I couldn’t get enough of His presence. I dreamed about Him in my sleep. I woke up thinking about Him. I thought of Him every moment of every day, and yes, I spent time in His Word in order to know Him more and find out every secret treasure hidden beneath the cover of His book.
I didn’t think “oh I’d better spend some time with Him so he’ll bless me or so I’d be a good servant.” Spending time with Him was and is the blessing. He is my exceeding great reward.
Well, this new romance caused many problems in my marriage. According to my husband, he was my God and he wouldn’t compete with some make-believe entity of my imagination. Amidst continual failures, my husband still fights to be my God and replace my love of ten years. Although he will never succeed, it is my hope that he will begin his own love affair soon and know the joy, peace and love of his Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
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