I’m not a funny person. How could I possibly write something humorous for this contest? When I try to tell a joke, I forget the punch line. Oh, it was real funny when I heard someone else tell the joke.
I worked with a woman who was funny without trying. It was a natural personality trait for her. I knew she was moving to a new house and thought she might want the empty copy paper box for packing.
“Hey Whitney, you wanna box?”
“I gave up boxing years ago,” she said as she posed with fists by her jaw, imitating the great boxer, George Foreman.
My husband says that I am so unaware of my surroundings he doesn’t know how I can survive life the way I do. He can imagine our house burning down and how I would react. I would walk up the sidewalk, up the step to the porch, with key in hand looking for the keyhole, and wonder what happened to the door, never noticing that the house is missing.
My mistakes make others laugh all the time.
Part of my job as a service representative was to enter descriptions for medical insurance coverage requests made by telephone. I wasn’t medically inclined, but had guidelines to follow for approvals. I repeatedly wrote ‘cabbage’ for a medical procedure that had something to do with the heart, because that’s what it sounded like over the phone. It was supposed to be ‘CABG’, some acronym for a medical procedure.
Once I was thinking about lunch as I finished typing the narrative for a medical insurance request, and instead of ‘lung infection’, I wrote ‘lunch infection’. Thankfully, one of the nurses read it before it went to the customer and the doctor.
Visiting my sister and her husband in Georgia, I was riding in the back seat of her car when I noticed something unusual in the front dashboard. There was a weird looking segmented bug-like thing that appeared to be crawling in a circle through the air vent, in and out repeatedly. I stared in shock unable to speak or move for a moment. Then I knew I had to speak and warn those in the front seat of what I saw. I fearfully told them there were bugs crawling in their air vents in the dashboard. Shocked and alarmed, they looked and saw nothing that resembled bugs. I pointed again at the impending danger lurking within their car. Laughter erupted as they realized the object of my fear. The car’s vent outlet had a rotating apparatus with a segmented center that looked like a huge bug to me. It was harmless.
I have an allergy to garlic. Ordering dinner at a restaurant requires care and understanding from the waiters/waitresses. Explaining my dilemma to my family for my unusual requests, we continued on with dinner. After dinner, I went to use the bathroom. There was a long line so it took me longer than usual. Because of my allergy to garlic, my family grew concerned that perhaps I mistakenly had garlic in my dinner and had a problem. They sent my niece to see if I was okay. She yelled out to see if I was in the bathroom. With all the noise in the bathroom, I didn’t hear her. She went back to tell my family that something was wrong. As I journeyed back through the restaurant to make my exit, my sister Linda met me all worry-eyed and frantic.
“Where have you been? We’ve been worried about you.”
“I can’t even go to the bathroom without causing a scene”, I commented.
The laughter continued throughout the evening.
I remember the first time I realized that God has a sense of humor. Reading John 20:4, with John as the only gospel account to tell this part of the story, John wants to be sure the reader knows that he ran faster than Peter; “the other disciple did outrun Peter.” I told my unsaved husband that he reminded me of the apostle John because if he wrote the gospel account, he would also make sure everyone knew that he was the faster runner. My husband agreed with my assessment.
So, I’m not funny when I try to be, but I do make people laugh in unintentional ways.
I hope this made you laugh, though it was intentional so it might not work.
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