Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  

Win A Publishing Package HERE            

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Cooking or Baking (01/04/07)

TITLE: Hypocrisy
By Kathleen Morris
01/04/07


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

Hypocrisy



“Get out of the way!” I shouted, lifting a charred apple pie from the smoke billowing oven, eyes full of tears, disappointed once again at my primitive skills in the kitchen.

“MARTHA STUART STRIKES AGAIN!” my husband teased with his usual insensitive sarcasm.

“Oh shut up!”

“You’re unbelievable,” he roared. “After ten years of marriage, you’d think you’d get the hang of it already.”

“I said SHUT UP, and leave me alone or I’ll never get dinner ready on time!”

“That’s right, you’ll never get dinner ready PERIOD! All I asked you to do was to make a simple meal for my boss. This was important to me Donna, it’s the difference between me getting the promotion and me being fired. HONESTLY! I’ll just call him and tell him we’ll meet him at a restaurant instead. I’m not taking my chances with YOUR cooking!”

“I’M SORRY!

“Whatever!” Darren frowned turning his back to me as he punched the numbers into the phone.

The smoke from the kitchen wafted into the living room and set the smoke detector into a deafening high-pitched frenzy.

Darren’s wild eyes glared, “DO SOMETHING!”

Suddenly, in the midst of me flagging the smoke detector down with a towel, Darren strangling the phone, and Casey screaming in her crib, the doorbell rang.

“OH NO!” Darren cried, “IT’S MY BOSS!”

I just stood there callous and defiant. I didn’t care. I wanted my husband to suffer. I wanted him to take the heat like I always did. Look at him jumping around like a jackrabbit squirming now when he NEEDS me.

He dropped the phone, darted around and flipped open the smoke detector yanking the batteries out. No more orchestra, just the sounds of his distraught daughter screaming in her room, that, and us hacking from the lingering smoke.

Darren’s eyes were even wilder now as he spit out a mouthful of profanities at me.

I didn’t move, I just crossed my arms in front of my chest and wondered where that Christ-filled man of mine had taken off to.

Casey’s screams were getting louder and I knew I couldn’t play this game much longer. My motherly instincts were overtaking my anger and I could feel my feet changing direction. Blasted man, he was going to win this one!

The doorbell continued to ring.

“I should have married a REAL woman!” Darren half shouted half whispered as he went for the door. “LIKE PROVERBS 31!”

Oh brother, not that line again.

I went to comfort Casey and returned to find Darren’s boss sitting in our smoke-filled living room. He stood as I neared and reached out to shake my hand, smiling at our whimpering daughter with big red eyes that matched her mother’s.

Darren didn’t even look at me.

“So, I just wanted to let you know the good news,” the man grinned at my husband. “The board voted and it was unanimous, you got the promotion! Yes, we’re very pleased with your work and think you’re just the most tenderhearted guy we’ve ever met.”

“How does it feel to be SENIOR pastor?”


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 568 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Tabiatha Tallent01/11/07
Wow, first I was laughing, and then shocked, and then sad. Sad, that this probably really does happen with some pastors. Good job.
lynn rodgers01/11/07
thats horible. but whats worse is it could be true.
Chuck Livermore01/11/07
Great twist at the end. I didn't see that one coming.
Delores Baber01/11/07
Your writing is excellent. The end left me grieving. How he must have grieved the Holy Spirit. Thanks for giving us a great, though painful example of the title of your piece.
Donna Emery01/11/07
Wow.You got me with that ending, too. What a shame he isn't living what he's preaching... and what a shame for the poor family. It was well-written and your point was well made.
Melanie Kerr 01/12/07
Excellent story. I was getting angrier by the moment - and then the cork popped at the end of the story! Wonderful descriptions and building up the tension.
Jan Ackerson 01/12/07
Perfect title, heart-rending story.

I was a bit put off by the capital letters. Your dialog was strong enough without them, and they were a bit distracting.

I wonder what we'd learn, if parsonage walls could talk...
Amy Michelle Wiley 01/12/07
Ah, I've had some pastors like that. Great writing and powerful punchline.
Becky Depp 01/13/07
Wow! This was great, the end made me stunned. Great job!
Myrna Noyes01/16/07
What a shock at the end! The story does indeed match your title! I'd love to know how the husband reacted immediately to the news and also what he said later to his wife after the board chairman had gone. Was he guilt-ridden and repentant? Hope so! Sobering but well-done story!
Joanne Sher 01/17/07
Wow - that twist definitely surprised me. Great dialogue and description. I enjoyed this very much!