The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/23/06
I enjoyed your submission. It was well written and expressed wise counsel. Good job...
11/23/06
Oh, this was so cute. A few punctuation errors, but nothing major. The only question that remains is how Amy react to the change?
11/24/06
Excellent job - I really liked how Sarah cringed at what she said to Connie, but it turned out to be just what what she needed to hear to change her mind. The world need more mothers like Sarah!!
Nice illustration on the difficulties of raising pre-teens. Especially, girls. Nice job.
11/24/06
A nice story. I'd really like to see those butterfly cakes! I can relate to the difficulties of dealing with rebellious teens. Good job!
11/25/06
Enjoyed the story. It was real. It sounded like any one of use could have been those mom's !
11/27/06
You did a wonderful job with the dialogue here - and this was a very engaging story. Nice job!
11/27/06
Hey, I'm hungry. Can I have a butterfly cake, too? :-)

I really liked this story with a lesson. As I read this story I kept thinking, "Just because everyone is doing it; it doesn't make it right." Thanks for the reminder.
11/27/06
Yes, I liked Sarah! Another excellent job here. Enjoyed the story, the writing and the message. God bless.
Believable dialogue, and well written, too. I've never heard of butterfly cakes, but you have me curious now. This was an enjoyable read.
11/28/06
This is well written and speaks a meaningful message. Nice job.
11/28/06
This is well written, good dialog, and a great message. Now, it would be fun to read chapter two to see how the three girls adjust to the turn-around party theme :)
11/29/06
Hmmmmmmmm! I've never heard of butterfly cakes either, and I was trying to picture them from your description! Too bad you couldn't have squeezed an actual recipe into the story somehow! :) Anyway, I, too, thought your dialogue sounded very realistic, and I can easily relate to what you wrote, as my daughter is now into her 20's and still rebellious sometimes!
11/29/06
I really enjoyed this! I can learn a lot from you about the fine art of dialog! Thanks for sharing!
11/29/06
Such a demanding job, being a parent. But being a parent who sticks to her guns, even more so! Great job
Hey Chrissy girl! Thanks for pointing my way here. This was a delight to read. Good job of dialogue and setting. My take home? It is easier to stand against compromise when we unite as parents. The hard part is being courageous and willing to take the risk to express your opinions first. Very creative and well written entry. Thanks, Chrissy.
Bonnie
11/30/06
Beautiful, Chrissy.

We grew up with 'fairy cakes' - exactly the same thing as your 'butterfly cakes' ... mmmmmm. Lovely memories - thanks for evoking them through your writing.
11/30/06
Congrats Chrissy! Way to go.
God bless.
11/30/06
Cute comparison with the title and storyline. A interesting read, I was a little curious as to how Connie could an 8-year-old Amy get away with short shorts and a midriff top. The message was clear though and you did a great job. Congrats on your win, and thanks for commenting on "Jacy's Motorcycle Mom"
Wow! I have an eight year old boy and you nailed that defiance bit right on. Your story actually gave me quite a bit of comfort, "Oh good it's not just my kid that pulls that stuff." I loved your story.
Cograts, Chrissy!
Great job...I especially loved your use of "beats"...In other words how you described what you're characters were doing as they spoke.
There was a great message sandwiched in this lovely story. Great job.
03/29/07
Really strong dialogue, great imagery given I want to find myself a butterfly cake, well any kind of cake, and devour right now! A great way to invoke modesty and values to a world in desperate need of that lesson!
This is good, speaks volumes in such a short entry.:0) Great work! Love it! Keep it up hon!God bless your day.Janice+-