The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/16/06
Please post more of your poems at Poetry and Poets of God: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/poetryandpoetsofgod/
I think you did a good job on writing this. I had a little trouble reading it due to the typos. Setting it aside and reading it anew sometimes helps. The typos include usage of words such as:
greatful/grateful
waist/waste
Other typos were stength/strength and
krept/kept?
Don't give up. You can write!
I enjoyed reading an end rhyme poem! My preference in poetry is "end rhyming" and I don't see a lot of anymore. This was pleasure and I liked the story. Great job!
11/18/06
This was a sweet and touching poem. Watch your spelling and keep writing.
11/19/06
i agree. have someone proofread befroe you submit, itll do worlds of good. also id be easier to read if it wasnt all one verse. other than that a phanominal poem
11/20/06
A very nice, simple, balanced poem. Just a typical day at the beach...until.... Good job at conveying emotions with a limited word count. I think a proofreader would help because most of these mistakes are actual words that the spell checker would not have picked up!