The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
This was good, but I want more. More detail, more information, more descriptions. This has the potential to be a really great piece.
Yowsers, I loved this! The river at the beginning was metaphorical, right, and your readers realize it at the moment when the narrator is reunited with her child...awesome.
Definitely I wanted more!!!! Such a wonderful metaphoric description of the separation between a mother and her missing daughter, then exhibited by tears. Tell us what happened before and after too!! Inquiring minds want to know!!!
This was an excellent episode, and it described the emotions of the mother so well. Very well done. Keep writing and sharing!
I'd suggest you lengthen this piece - it's potential is so much greater with the fantastic start you gave it. Great twist. You've got the meat now give it some more flavor! Great job. Jo
I hope you do not mind a better-late-than-never comment on this wonderful essay. This now has to be one of my favorite pieces since I've been a member here. It incorporates all that I would ever hope to have in a story. It has depth, emotion, skill, imagery. Excellent job. I am very impressed. I'm glad I found this. God bless.