Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Mother (as in maternal parent) (04/24/08)
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TITLE: Birth of a Mother | Previous Challenge Entry
By Tanya Kirkegaard
04/28/08 -
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Celia stirred in her sleep and Rebecca cringed at the thought of waking her. Should she shouldn’t she, maybe it’s a false alarm and it would all go away. Rebecca debated with herself, always unsure of how to bring things up with her mother. They were never really close, even though Rebecca was an only child and they spent most of their time together. They never bonded closely or shared things in life like a mother and daughter should. Rebecca grew up in a family that denied so many things it was natural for her to ignore and deny the pregnancy for as long as possible. The next contraction came upon her like a crashing wave and her waters broke with a gush, all over the blankets. Like everything in Rebecca’s life, she couldn’t deny it any more and her mother woke in a panic.
The eminent birth of Celia’s first grandchild was shrouded in shame and disappointment, so it wasn’t going to be something that would bring them together. Always organized, Celia quickly gathered everything Rebecca would need for her stay in hospital and they were off. As the drive to the hospital was a good half hour away and Rebecca’s contractions were still fifteen to twenty minutes apart, they had plenty of time to talk on the way, but they didn’t. The trip was a silent one with nothing but a glance of concern from Celia with each tightly gripped contraction Rebecca experienced.
They arrived at the maternity ward and Rebecca was ushered off to what seemed like another world to her. Rebecca thought everything seemed so surreal, it was like she wasn’t even there, that it was all happening to someone else. After a long and arduous labour lasting 13 hours, Rebecca gave birth to a 7lb12oz baby boy. Celia waited outside the whole time, never once letting her guard down to come and support her frightened daughter, but that was Rebecca’s mum, emotionally detached and distant, possessing very little maternal instinct.
As the baby was marked for adoption, he was whisked away in a whirlwind of shame and secrecy to a separate ward in the hospital. Rebecca was left to clean herself up and afterwards, was ushered off to a lonely room, which would serve as her solitude of confusion for the week to come. She felt so many things, but not one of them was positive or happy. A multitude of negative emotions ran through her. Rebecca soon realized that things must get better, that there is more to life than the hurt and pain she had experienced. In her bedside drawer was a Bible, curiously she began to read. It wasn’t long before her eyes were opened and she felt compelled to give her heart to Jesus. Hope was restored to Rebecca that day and she knew she would never be alone again.
Rebecca persevered with the “at arm’s length” relationship she had with her mother.They have mended many bridges and have a true mother and daughter relationship. Rebecca gave birth to her own motherhood that day, a realization and understanding of how a Mother should be. Celia had helped Rebecca to become the mother that she had wanted and so desperately needed for herself, and in doing so, Celia became aware of her shortcomings and asked Rebecca for forgiveness.
Celia has five more grandchildren and has become a better grandmother than she was a mother. Rebecca ensured her relationships with her children were what she had expected from Celia. She never let a day go by without saying “I Love You” to her children and she learnt that forgiveness is the key for healing all wounds.
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Otherwise, I'm glad that there was a happy ending and that they were able to mend some bridges and communicate to each other and eventually share the joy of motherhood.