Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Write in the ADVENTURE genre (05/24/07)
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TITLE: The Mystery Voice | Previous Challenge Entry
By Dianne Janak
05/29/07 -
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I was driving on a four lane freeway in a hurry to pick up my husband, changing from the fast lane to the outer slower lane to exit the freeway. I didn’t see what happened, but I saw a minivan coming at me sideways. I had no time to brake and barely got out a scream at the impact of 60mph. Even though my seat belt and airbag kept me in the car I had the sensation of flying upside down as my car tumbled in the air. My next thought was a plea to God to let me live, and then to let me not be laid up in a hospital maimed for life.. Sometimes prayers are more thoughts than words when life is on the line and I knew mine was. My car was upside down in a ditch. All I could see was dirt next to the windshield and I began to panic. Over and over again I was saying “Jesus help me, Jesus help me, Jesus help me.” Adding to my fear was thoughts of my car bursting in flames before I could get out. I was desperately alone and afraid until I heard it. A voice behind me. A woman’s voice, tender and soft and calm.
I heard her say “move your arms and legs… we need to check to see if there are any broken bones..”. I did as she said and there was no pain so she said “I don’t think anything is broken. The only mark on me was from the airbag leaving a superficial skin burn on my arm.. She then said “I am going to talk you out of the car .” I will never forget the love, concern, and authority in her voice that calmed my fear and panic. I thought perhaps she is a nurse who stopped to aide me and is used to being in situations like this. I remember thinking if she is just a passerby helping me I don’t think I could ever have sounded as calm and in control as she was. Her manner gave me a peace that was supernatural and impossible to understand with my rational reasoning. I just wanted to just sit with this stranger and talk over coffee at a less stressful scene. Weird my mind was thinking that, but her demeanor was contagious and I was feeling so drawn to wanting whatever it was that she had.
I have no reasonable explanation for what I remember next, because my memory gets a little fuzzy . I have no idea how I got out of the car. There was a time lapse when I found myself sitting on the side of the road , watching the police, fire trucks and ambulances. Asking me if that was my car upside down and totaled, they seem puzzled that I was not hurt. But the mystery to me was the voice that seemed to be an invisible woman’s. She never showed up. She was so caring and so concerned for my well being, but I never saw her after she told me how to get out of the car. I felt such a supernatural presence sitting there that I started to loudly and boldly tell everyone that asked me….”this was the power of God… this was the power of God. “ Who was the mysterious voice? Where did she come from and where did she go?
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Consider breaking the large paragraphs into shorter, more digestible chunks, and choosing a title that does not give away your exciting ending.
Wonderful story.