The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
07/28/06
A nice retelling - and your title is JUST right. Traditional paragraph structure would help this, I think, and maybe a bit more detail. Great job weaving the topic throughout!
07/29/06
This view of Jesus and Peter's walk on the water is nicely worded.

I especially like this line:
"I found myself falling, sinking, almost out of his grasp.
He grabbed just in time to rescue me from myself."
because it describes our own initial coming to the Lord.

I am not a poet, so I forego any comment on poetic style.

Thanks for writing this!
08/02/06
I like this piece...I noticed one thing you might consider changing...Line 8: "That day...especially tiring and gruesome" -- I think you may mean "grueling" -- which is basically a synonym for tiring...gruesome, for me, is a word that means bloody...

Over all, I like it. I agree that you may consider using paragraphs rather than stanzas.

Keep up the good work!!