The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
07/27/06
You have a style of writing that is pleasant to read, except ... except that your narration is jumpy. It feels like I'm hopping from one idea to another rather than following the flow. One thing should lead to another.

Oh yes, careful how you use those adverbs.
07/30/06
You give some positive options for people so that they don't wallow in self. I wouldn't even allow friends to say a black cloud hovered over me! I loved the suggestions for helping other people who are ill or down. You've spread a good message and encouragement. It's true, there is a sense of skipping around, but that is easily fixed. Your writing shows promise and will get better and better, thanks to the pointers.
08/02/06
Thanks for sharing your perspective and wisdom, gotta love those dogs!