The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
07/20/06
Very nice piece! I can tell your heart is in this one. The meter seems a bit off, but otherwise I enjoyed it - especially this stanza:
For on earth my Mom was troubled deep
And her body and mind in despair.
But now her soul is free indeed
Within the Masterís care!
This is a wonderful testimony to your love for your mom. I enjoyed this poem, especially the message of your mother being freed from her cares and pain. Let me suggest that you take a look at your meter and soften the flow a bit. Keep writing...you have heart!
Brought back memories held close to the heart. Thank-you for writing this.
A very special poem which I enjoyed reading. Having recently lost a parent to illness, I too find myself conjuring up images of what it must be like for them there. Well done.
07/26/06
A beautiful heartfelt poem - and with a little work on meter and flow, it could be a great poem. The message was beautiful and sincere - and reminded me of my own mother. Thank you.