The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
07/13/06
I love this entry!! You tackled "Great" from a different perspective. I really enjoyed the conversation with the old man and the importance of being a great servant. Keep writing. I enjoyed this very much.
I liked the story and the fact that you remembered the conversation - must have had a great impact on you.
Sounds just like a parable Jesus would tell. GREAT job! You get a very important point across in a wonderful way! BRAVO.
07/17/06
What a neat story - you really drew me in and kept me there from beginning to end! And what a message. Your ending is quite powerful.
07/17/06
Well written!! Great dialogue! You might want to space it up better as I found it abit difficult to read without the spacing. But was rewarded by your good story. One note, typo on 'any tricks' should be any. Keep at it - you are good!!
07/17/06
A wonderful way to express the truth that the greatest is the one who is servant of all. Nicely done.
07/17/06
I'm delighted to find a story about the "Greatest Show on Earth" in the "great" category. Sadly, the circus is gone, but not the stories that can be told. And, your well-told story leaves us with a good message as well. Good job!
07/17/06
Great job! Well written!
07/17/06
Great life lesson. Nicely told.
07/18/06
This is wonderful, especially for a first challenge entry! Very atmospheric and subtle, with a message but not preachified. Feel free to e-mail or PM me, and I'll walk you through the formatting problems (spacing). This is an outstanding story.
07/18/06
Thank you all for your comments. Several of you mentions spacing problems. When I wrote it it was indented. I cut and pasted it and that's how it ended up. I'll do better next time, sorry.
07/18/06
Hi Phillip-
Don't let the formatting problems get you down. They are easily corrected. Your story was wonderful and that's what counts! :-)
I like this. Clear pictures of what you were trying to convey. I could see the old man talking to the boy, and see the surprise on his face when he told the boy his position. You did a wonderful job. Keep writing
07/20/06
Double CONGRATULATIONS! Winning on your first entry is mighty impressive. Welcome to Faithwriters, too, your new "home away from home." We're glad to have you on board.