Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Join Faith
Writers
Forum
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  

Get Our Daily Devotional             Win A Publishing Package             Detailed Navigation

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Personal Peace (06/01/06)

TITLE: To Really Know Chipper
By Trina Courtenay
06/06/06


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

“Chipper.” Katie nearly screamed across the dinning room. “Come here. We need to talk.”

The petit brunette excused herself from the grumpy costumer she was being insulted by and made her way across the restaurant to her co-worker. “What is it Katie? Can’t it wait until after I deal with Grumpy and his slimy egg situation?”

“Chipper, you’re a waitress not a welcome mat for insults. You don’t have to stand there and take what that jerk is dishing out. Sticks and stones may break your bones but they will heal, hopefully…anyhow, there’s no cure for names, they stay with you for life.”

“It all depends on who it is calling you the name.” Chipper quickly responded.

Katie threw her arms up in defeat and thought to herself she would never understand how Chipper could stand there and let Grumpy treat her that way or how Chipper kept a smile on her face and was able to remain calm though it all.

Katie wanted to know what it was that made Chipper different from anyone she’d ever known but the difference had always eluded her.

Admitting defeat Katie said, “You’re right.” But as she turned to walk back to her own section she made a vow to keep one eye on Chipper and the other on Grumpy. If she had too, she would stick up for her friend.


***


Someone whistled. It echoed throughout the brightly lit room. Grumpy stood up and yelled, “Wench, you call this sunny side up? Why they’re hard boiled. First you serve eggs that didn’t even hit the griddle and then you serve eggs that must have been left for hours on the darn thing.”

Katie and Chipper both ran to the man’s table in fear he would get louder and make an even bigger scene. Katie was the first to speak. “Sir, we are not dogs so do not and I mean do not whistle at us, we do have names.” Pausing only long enough to clear her throat and point at her name tag Katie continued, “I don’t know who peed in your corn flakes this morning but that doesn’t give you the right to treat Chipper like that.”

“Well now, aren’t you just as stupid as your friend here?” Grumpy pointed to Chipper and then looked back at Katie. “I ordered bacon and eggs, NOT cornflakes.”

Katie had heard enough and told the man to leave.

“Leave. I have every right to be here. I am a paying customer. Without me you wouldn’t have a job.”

“I’d rather starve then have to serve your kind.”

“My Kind? Well I’ll be.” Grumpy stood up, grabbed his plate and threw it to the floor. His eyes blazed with anger. “You stupid, no good, lowlife waitresses, I’m going to tell all of my friends what happened here.” With that he stormed out of the restaurant letting the door slam.

Chipper broke down and started to cry. She was ashamed of how she had let the situation get out of control.

Katie took her friend into her arms. Whispered that everything would be okay and how they wouldn’t get fired. That the customer was a jerk and neither one of them were stupid or wenches. But no matter what Katie said comfort would not come to Chipper.

Finally Chipper lifted her head from Katie’s shoulder and said, “I need to go out back for a minute and pray, and then I’ll be fine.”

“Pray?”

Chipper’s smile returned to her face as she confidently said, “I’ll find comfort talking to my Lord and Savoir.”

Awestruck with disbelief Katie had to ask, “Your Lord and Savoir? Where was ‘He’ just now when you were verbally torn to shreds?”

“He was right beside me helping me to hold my tongue so I wouldn’t drop to Grumpy’s level. He reminded me that I am His child and that knowledge gives me comfort. No it’s more than that it gives me peace which in turn helps me to deal with the situation I am facing.”

Katie snapped, “Whatever works for you.”

Not to be dissuaded by Katie’s snide remark, Chipper let her smile broadened as she finished her explanation. “It’s because of Him I was nicknamed Chipper and every day I try to live up it.”

Katie now knew what made Chipper, Chipper. She would never have guessed. Not in a million years. Chipper had the Lord in her life, He gave her peace and that’s what made her different.


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 784 times
Member Comments
Member Date
julie wood06/08/06
I really enjoy the dialogue in this story! I can see and hear the characters--and feel the vivid contrast between the attitudes of the two waitresses as they deal with the cranky customer. By the way, "Savoir" is actually spelled "Savior."
Virginia Gorg06/12/06
Good reminder to hold our tongue and rely on Jesus.
Edy T Johnson 06/13/06
You know how to tell a good story. You use dialog very well to give us pictures of your characters. God bless your writing!
Anita Neuman06/13/06
Great story with a great lesson! There's not much to critique here, but I think you could tighten your point of view a little bit. There were just a couple of spots where I wasn't sure whose head we were in. Otherwise, you've done a really great job with this. I especially appreciate how well you interspersed the dialogue with actions - great balance!
Jan Ackerson 06/14/06
I agree with Anita about the POV (and note correct spelling of "savior"). A great story of being an everyday witness. I'm glad I read this today.
Dr. Sharon Schuetz06/14/06
Good story and yes, your dialogue was pretty good. Enjoyed it. (I'd have thrown the old goat out too.)