The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
06/08/06
A lovely slice of life story. You have a relaxed style that's very pleasant to read. Great description gave a real sense of being in the boat on the water. You could have a lot of fun using this as the basis for a fiction story, adding in invented dialogue, building up the tension between the husband and wife. Asking yourself questions like: Does he blame her? Why? How do they resolve/not resolve the problem? What's his reaction at the end? Oh, what if this happened on their honeymoon, how awful would that be? Anyway, have fun! :-) Yeggy

06/09/06
This is the best fish story I've ever heard. You have the gift for spinning a yarn, as well, and your word selections, etc., read like poetry. I just love the kicker at the end!

All that being true, it strikes me that neither Mike nor the narrator experienced much "peace" through this story. Did I miss something? Or was the walleye that escaped the hook TWICE your peace-maker? {Or, maybe this is an example of how we allow peace to be snatched away from us?)
06/10/06
Your story takes my back to fishing trips with my brother, and I thank God for those times.
Great piece. Thanks for the memory.
06/11/06
There is something hypnotic and peaceful about the process of casting a line to catch a fish. I have felt it many times over in my life. To show how you lost that peace only made the experience more real for me. The ending was fantastic and unexpected! Great job!
06/12/06
Very well-written, in a casual, readable voice. I enjoyed this.
06/12/06
Very descriptive - nicely done. It seems the fish has all the peace in this one!
06/12/06
Very enjoyable read. Well written and seems to be a true experience - therefore the empathy.
Very cool piece. I loved your use of description and humor ("seldom used" net, etc). You set the scene very well and your story had an excellent flow to it.

I too was a bit puzzled at his reaction. Being a fisherman myself and dealt with many, many hours of not so much as a bite, I have one piece of advice for the husband; deal with it. He caught the big one. Most people can never say that.

Great job with an entertaining story. Keep it up!
This is very good. You have a smooth, easy style that's easy to read. Good job.