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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Prosperity (05/11/06)

TITLE: A Society of Numbers
By chase bowman


Two kids play happily on a playground, under the star which gives life to the planet which we reside. Unaware of the future ahead of them, and the dilemmas and trilemmas that will forever plague their existence. Molding and forming them into little parts of an organism which we call “society”, the kids will fight against the most instinctive of human traits: complacency. The trait that separates us from all the other primitive animals who just eat, sleep, and sustain life, along with a few other minute activities. Over centuries of evolution, the human trait of complacency has transformed into the”greatest sin” (according to C.S. Lewis) which is pride. Let me explain. First we start off trying to better ourselves in our lives. We buy bigger houses, nicer cars, and cell phones so small we need toothpicks to dial the numbers (please forgive me for the excessive embellishment). Then the idea of bettering ourselves becomes the idea of bettering our “status” in society. What use does a basketball player need with $200 shoes? Does it increase the talent of the player? Does it increase his hand eye coordination more than the regular shoe that costs $30?
In my young years I have come to the conclusion that judgment of a person depends on the “number” he makes. The “number” that defines our friends, our schools, our churches, and dare I say…our lives. Let’s forget the traditional definition of prosperity in all of its economic terms. Statistics are not the way to judge a man’s wealth. But let us judge a man on his convictions, his passions. Money mirrors cinema in the sense of its realness. Money is more mortal than any man.
The weed of pride is growing freely in our world strangling and suffocating all of us as we fertilize it with our unhealthy ambitions. Ambition is not a sin don’t get me wrong and in fact a great characteristic to possess, but if used to promote ones status for the use of comparing others to oneself then it can be a dangerous companion. We as a society should for one day sustain from comparing ourselves to our peers, and live with them as if they were our family. Trying to take care of them and help them, not to look down upon them because of their “number”.
In a world of battles and wars, I have learned the greatest fight is the one within. I have been guilty of pride more times than any mathematician can count but I try to acknowledge it, and starve that undying weed. I have no house and no job because I am nothing but a mere student of knowledge and a student of the world. When I graduate I hope to sow my seeds in fertile soil so that my investments will become prosperous, just like every other man plans. The difference is that my soil is not fertilized with water from the earth, but the blood of a man who died for humanity, so that our “numbers” will not matter. My prosperity will not be exposed or expressed in “numbers”, but the faith I have and grow in. For those of you who feel that you are losing in the “numbers” race, remember that you are far more prosperous through the Almighty, than through a piece of paper with someone’s face on it.
In conclusion, there is only one way to really inherit prosperity, and it is through Jesus Christ. Remember that wealth of a man is judged by the eyes of the beholder much like beauty. Let us not be judged through the gaze of a human, but the eyes of the Divine, for wealth will bring you all the desires of a fallen civilization, but prosperity in god brings the Kingdom of Heaven.

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Member Comments
Member Date
Edy T Johnson 05/19/06
I would take issue with your statement: "Over centuries of evolution...." but that's a topic for another day.

You have a creative passion, but it reminds me a bit of an unbridled horse, rather wild and unstructured. My recommendation is to tell a story and let one of your characters bring the "preachy" message. That way, your readers are more apt to stick with you and won't feel under verbal attack. Keep at it, and God bless your work!
Jan Ackerson 05/22/06
There are any number of good, truthful, and sound statements here--perhaps too many? It seemed to lack focus; consider taking one point only, and developing it through specific anecdotes. You're a passionate writer; when you focus that passion, your writing will soar.
Dr. Sharon Schuetz05/24/06
You are a talented communicator. I agree if you used characters or perhaps illustrations it would make this a stronger piece. With a little tightening up, you could say everything you had to say in half the words, and accomplish a whole lot.