The Official Writing Challenge
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Your story was intriguing. It kept my interest the entire time. You definitely have talent. (Just remember to capitalize 'Bible' I always think it's necessary and respectful.) God has blessed you with such a good story-telling gift. Keep it up!
Very good. I was touched by the author's sincerity. Tears misted my eyes when Carly found her own purpose, and a Savior who also loved her.
This is a great little story. You captured my heart and interest right from the first sentence. Well done!
Good story, with a strong beginning and a good story development. FOr my own taste, I prefer not to have things wrapped up too neatly by the end - so I'd have prefered her to leave with her heart warmed and her spirit stirred - knowing she'd be back... but given the ending you chose, it finished well, too. Well done.
I'm with Helen--750 words really isn't enough for a person to go through such a life transformation--consider a more open-ended story, perhaps, with Carly mulling over her experiences...good writing, and a clever idea. Thanks for this story.