The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
03/13/06
Good story and smooth flow. Well done.
03/14/06
I'm a bit confused by the ages of the students here, and by the setting. The illustration is great, though.
I wish that we were able to have this type of teaching in the schoold.

We have been robbed, and our children are being robbed from these treasures. Just think I could have spent my life studing Bible Prophecy which I love. I could have been teaching Bible Prophecy!

I wonder if I have a case with the ACLU, after all I am OFFENDED that I was not made aware of these things in school. lol
03/16/06
Good story! We certainly need more teachers like this. Kate~
03/16/06
This was very nice- made me sad to think how little this could really happen in America. Something I've learned this year: avoid using things like "Mr. Carr said" or "asked Mr. Carr" around the dialog. Instead do something like this:

Mr. Carr set his briefcase on the desk. "Today we will be discussing..."

That way we know he is talking, but you didn't have to into with "Mr. Carr said"

Smooth reading though and enjoyable.
A great story, but unrealstic in many parts of the world (unless the school is private or Christian) I thought you were very creative with the topic!
03/17/06
I'm guessing this wasn't set in a public school? :) nicely done, some good things there.
03/18/06
Impossible scenario in today's world - sad to say. God and the Bible have been kicked out of everywhere except the heart of man...and that is why FW is so great! Nice job, however; and thanks for sharing.
Is this a public school or a private school? I dont remember a marketing class being taught in High school, is this college? It's obvious that the message in the story is what is important, but the setting and background dont seem realistic and detract from the main point.