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The Home for Christian Writers! The Official Writing Challenge BACK TO CHALLENGE MAIN INSTRUCTIONS how it works submission rules guidelines for choosing a level ENTRIES submit your entry read current entries read past entries challenge winners Our Daily Devotional HERE Place it on your site or receive it daily by email. TRUST JESUS TODAY Share Tweet how it works   Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner) Topic: Help (02/20/06) TITLE: Boxed by my own concessions By Andre Kingston 02/25/06  LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE  SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT  ADD TO MY FAVORITES Dear Lord, I feel caged held captive by my own choices by my own concessions He is anchored here He has a good job here He has a condo here He has family here I am anchored to him in his house with his stuff I own nothing I suffocate here no room for the soul no room for negotiation no room for me. I cannot walk away now, It has gone too far You would not have me leave now I don’t want to leave How can I break free? what would it take? would ownership be enough? would a home be enough? Help me to know You are in charge that this box is in your control Help me to know You are with me here in my cage Help me to know You have a plan this too shall pass in spite of me. Help me to know You are. PREVIOUS ENTRY | NEXT ENTRY SUBMIT YOUR ENTRY FOR THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com. If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel. This article has been read 627 times Member Comments Member Date Marilyn Schnepp  03/02/06 I read a very confused person reaching out for help - and the last line? "you are"? I can seem to grasp the meaning ...but I still liked it, even without understanding it all. Keep up the good work. David Ian 03/02/06 I don't think you quite understand how well you have captured a very common theme among domestics at home. Also very advanced in the piece is ownership of personal choices instead of blaming all involved. That's for content -- I'm extremely impressed. The form is also very good, creating a good expression within the repetition and the cadence of the piece. Well done! Jan Ackerson  03/02/06 A heartfelt cry for help, beautifully expressed. Jesus Puppy  03/02/06 Very well done, the expression of how they are feeling trapped is very easy to see. And knowing that God is there through it all, even in the midst of our pain and doubts. Good job. Pat Guy  03/03/06 Wow! This is pretty good! I really enjoyed reading this! Good, good stuff! Cheryl Harrison  03/03/06 Great job! Poetic cry for help and freedom. Shari Armstrong  03/04/06 Very well done :) Maxx . 03/05/06 I struggled with parts of this. I read this as a cry from a wife... but she is talking about living with her own concessions. I never thought that becomming a wife was a concession (well, maybe for MY wife, but not most!) Instead, it is a mutual increase, a growth opportunity for both. Had this been a relationship between two unmarried people then I could see the use of the term concession. But, the struggle came through loud and clear. The grappling with "who am I" was strong. But I never really recovered from teh opening stanza... my thought throughout was that if she sees her marriage as a step backward, a concession, giving up, surrendering, yielding, etc, that no wonder she continues to struggle. Rachel Rudd 03/06/06 I, too, wondered whether this was to depict a married or an unmarried woman. I look up concession in the dictionary just to clarify. Since concession means something conceded and to concede means to yield, I think this poem could fit with a wife, too. We do have to yield lots when we get married! Anyways, well-written. I like the way each stanza flows... I thought about the last line, too...you are....God's name is I am...is that what you were intending to imply? Steve Clark 03/06/06 Beautifully done Andre! You captured the internal turmoil of a wife who entered into her marriage with hopes of a life fulfilled and now finds the reality of things to be less than desired. Relationships change, interests shift, and we end up in a marriage that is headed in the wrong direction, eroding our hope of it reaching its glorious promise. I see in her quiet desperation a seething discontent that comes out in references to being in a cage and the rue of conceding anything of such great importance. I clearly see the "You are" as being in connection to the "I am" of Jehovah. I believe Andre clearly intended it. Perhaps you should move up a level.

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